By Julien Munoz
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The smile is brilliant, the tone never dramatic. One day in 2019, cancer entered Maureen’s life when she turned 35. He will never really come out of it. The body, tired, is no longer as lively as the mind, as often as possible positive.
When you come close to death, you no longer look at the time that passes, but rather at the time that remains. This one is all the more savored, down to the small details, once the priorities of existence have been put back in the right direction.
“When you have cancer, it’s hard not to feel guilty. I had to mourn myself. Never again will I have the same life, nor the same way of seeing the world. »
Too young to be sick?
resident of Pious (Manche), at the age when girlfriends build their lives, Maureen clings to hers. A life of struggle. On social networks, she shares her experience in support groups. Many young women, who sometimes lost months before having a diagnosis, like her. Women that we did not know how to listen to.
Maureen assures him, she’s not the hypochondriac type. Even less to ask examinations to his doctor. Still, she sensed that something was wrong. They told her she was too young. How to hear it?
Several times I asked for exams. I have two grandmothers who had breast cancer. The first time was in 2018. My doctor asked me why. I replied that I had a strong feeling. Instinct. He asked me if I felt anything, I said no, nothing physical. I should have said yes. We don’t think about it at the moment. I would have won a year. An ultrasound, I’ve already paid for one out of pocket. It costs forty-two euros. Today I cost thousands of euros…
The doubt was well founded. The right breast had something. A few months later, she learns that she must leave the cottage in which she works in Guadeloupe for return to France urgently.
The kidney problem she lives with, diagnosed in 2012, had gotten worse.
I learned that a transplant would be necessary. I immediately started the pre-transplant assessment, for which I had to see all the specialists, including the gynecologist. Appointments are given by the nephrologist. He told me that for the gynecological part, it was not a priority to have a complete check-up, because I was young. Again, I escape the echo and the mammo…
Six months later, in 2019, this time she feels a lump in her breast. The stage is advanced, with capsule rupture. This gives free rein to the cancer to roam in his body. The diagnosis is too late. Difficult to realize right away when the word ” cancer “ is pronounced. Maureen tries above all to reassure the family. The doctor says it’s not that serious.
The doctors tell us that there will be three of us in the battle: the patient, with your morale. The doctors. And the surroundings. If one of the three pillars is missing, it won’t work.
The fight for life
Her parents move in with her to support her. The Sword of Damocles with which everyone lives above his head seems sharper once life events come to remind, in the whites of the eyes, that one day death will come. You have to learn to move forward knowing yourself survivor.
The same week, Maureen learns that her sisterwishing to be a donor, was well suited for the kidney transplant. This will never happen, unless there is a miracle solution.
More and more cancers before fifty
A scientific study, published in the journal Nature Reviews Clinical Oncology and carried out using data collected between 2000 and 2012, reveals a significant global increase in fourteen types of cancer in people under 50 years of age. “Over the past few decades, the incidence of early onset cancers, often defined as cancers diagnosed in adults over 50 years of age, in the breast, colorectum, endometrium, esophagus, extra bile ducts -hepatic, gallbladder, head and neck, kidneys, liver, bone marrow, pancreas, prostate, stomach and thyroid increased in several countries,” say the scientists.
Maureen struggles with her tiny body to hold it together. She knows it. One day or another, there will probably be dialysis.
Very quickly, the treatment protocol begins. Chemotherapy (underdosed in relation to his kidney problem), radiotherapy and breast removal and ganglia. Hormone therapy and its effects, too.
metastases on screen
A few months will pass, the cancer is in remission. And then, last October, the world collapsed. recurrence is diagnosed. Passing a Tep Scan in November, about fifteen metastases appear on the bones. The tone of the doctors changes a little. Processing resumes.
Cancer is hormone dependent. The ovaries are removed. It’s still a little feeling of femininity that goes away.
Last April, she learned that the metastases are asleep. They are no longer visible on the scan, but will never be destroyed. They can wake up. In six months, in twenty years… No one can say.
Life and nothing else
Sometimes, Maureen thinks of her life before, in a time of a certain innocence, even dented by the trials of everyday life. To regain a little of lightnessthe pleasure evenings with friends or right to be able to go to work.
You have to learn to restrictfind other pleasures in the little moments that yesterday seemed trivial.
The days are punctuated by care, rest and waiting for exams, in Caen, every three months, to find out how things are progressing.
A kind of permanent countdown. Difficult to project beyond. “I put things into perspective more. I have less difficulty expelling from my life what can be toxic. We live for ourselves. »
You have to learn to live with the new way others look at you. Live too, with the fear of having to do this to someone.
I’m afraid to impose something on someone who doesn’t deserve it. What I have to do is keep my spirits up. Otherwise, we make our brain understand that there is no more hope… and it’s over… There is always hope!
Breast cancer is the most common cancer in France and is the leading cause of death from cancer in women.
It is the subject of a national screening program organized in order to be detected early and to reduce mortality.
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