I suffer from emotional loneliness: what should I do?

Emotional loneliness is a state in which we feel emotionally disconnected from the people around us or unable to connect with them.

What is this condition due to? What can be the consequences? How to fight against emotional loneliness? Here are our explanations.

What is affective loneliness?

Emotional loneliness affects many people. Indeed, in France, INSEE estimates that 10 million people live alone, i.e. aroundor 15% of the population. The proportion of women experiencing this situation continues to increase. They are 25% to be confronted with this phenomenon at 54 years old, and 55% at 84 years old.

Emotional loneliness corresponds to a state that manifests itself in the anguish and sadness of being alone. It can be felt:

• in the couple in case of love dependence, real addiction to the other;
• in single people in a situation of emotional dependence, which is an addiction that manifests itself in particular by difficulties in romantic, friendly or family relationships. In this case, single people are confronted every day with their emotional void that no one is then able to fill.

What causes emotional loneliness?

Emotional loneliness can result from many circumstances that can begin in childhood or in adulthood:

• Parental neglect or childhood trauma: It would appear to be more difficult to form close emotional bonds in adulthood when one has not had such a bond with a parent or parent figure during childhood ;
• later pairing;
• difficulties in finding a soul mate;
• increase in the number of separations;
• loss of a loved one;
• longer life;
• substance abuse: people who use drugs are more likely to feel emotionally lonely, although drug abuse may be a consequence or cause of loneliness;
• life situational changes: a person may develop short-term emotional loneliness when they move to a new city, change jobs, or face other significant life changes;
• overuse of media and social networks.

What are the consequences of emotional loneliness?

Emotional loneliness can be experienced as an insurmountable drama that can lead to:

• a loss of life force;
• an anxious state;
• sadness.

It can plunge the person affected into a feeling of deep unease, which can sometimes lead to depression.

It can also be expressed by:

• a constant need to be reassured;
• an intense fear of losing the relational bond;
• difficulty making decisions for oneself;
• separation anxieties;
• deep attachment disorder.

Fighting emotional loneliness can require:

• time ;
• Energy ;
• motivation.

To remedy this, here are some tips:

Take a step back from the media and social networks

Television can accentuate the feeling of emptiness, just like the telephone and social networks, which are often only a lure to forget emotional loneliness. It is better to take the time to talk with loved ones, on the phone or face to face.

Live your passions

Being passionate about a cultural or sporting activity is very rewarding. When you dedicate yourself to an occupation that you love, you forget about time and your emotional loneliness.

Take a step back from emotional loneliness

Recognize the advantages of living alone, of having time for yourself, of being able to do things at your own pace, according to your desires.

Be at peace with yourself

Important step to enjoy life, have a good time with yourself and live in peace. Accept yourself as you are, come to terms with your past and your decisions.

To be optimistic

Take things on the bright side and always see the glass as half full. To fight against emotional loneliness, you have to try to enjoy things as they come.

Take care of others

Mobilizing for a charitable cause is a good way to feel useful and to meet other people who can give a different vision of things. They can bring a lot through their experience, their presence and their interest. In the same logic, caring for an animal is a good way to receive and give affection.

Stock up on books and movies

Take advantage of moments of solitude to revisit the classics and feed on readings and films by taking an interest in new genres.

Practice a physical activity

Sport is a way to move your body and your head, and also an opportunity to meet new people.

Travel

Discover all that the world has to offer by being, for example, hosted by locals who want to discover their culture.